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It’s interesting, but please move off deviant art!

By Oniwasabi, author of The Monster They Deserve

Sep 21, 2014: Don’t know if it’s just me, but I hate the layout of DA for written stuff. Moving on!

I really liked the premise for this story, of which I can’t detail much here without lots of spoilers. Suffice to say, it’s a (in my experience at least) unique approach to how magic works and has some interesting rules to it. Additionally the author does a very good job of writing from one character’s perspective at a time to make the point of view really engaging (some chapters are literally exactly the previous chapter’s events but from the opposite perspective, and the perspective shift is sufficiently different that this WASN’T aggravating rehashing of info). This works to give the story some very deeply detailed main characters.

For negatives: mostly length so far (which I’m assuming will be fixed by time) and a need for a few more editing passes (there are the standard typos, mostly not too jarring though the first person perspective does amplify the jarring feeling for me)

So overall, definitely a read I recommend, and hope will be hosted elsewhere in the future!

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