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Draws you in and hooks you with early action scenes

By Shandrydan, member

Feb 27, 2010: Lucky Monday starts with an intriguing short introduction to the character “Lucky Monday” – a person that receives notification of her death every time she opens a fortune cookie – and then launches you right into the action watching a mysterious character called The Detective being thrown out of a third story window.

Lucky Monday lives in a world which may be our own, but a world in which strange things are happening. “Pod people” are out to get her and the Detective, who Lucky has just met but somehow seems to have known her from before she was born, is here to protect her and teach her something about this new world. It is a shame he’s not that good at the teaching bit.

Lucky is “barely eighteen” and a young woman who ever since she can remember has been receiving strange messages, most of them impolite. It is clear she has had a very unpleasant relationship with her father (we know nothing about her mother as yet) and before the Detective arrived she was on her own.

What I like: it is a well written story (only 6 short chapters posted at the time of this review), written in the style of pulp sci-fi (you may disagree with that description, but it came into my head when reading it). It’s easy to read and there is plenty of action and mystery. It is also quite funny in places.

What I am not sure about : the voice of the main character does not sound as though she is “barely eighteen” but maybe this is deliberate as we find out that she has had previous lives (or at least has known two of the characters a long time ago). Lucky also swears quite a lot. Some of it fits, but at times it seems over done and unnecessary, and stands out. I don’t mind swearing – it is one of my favorite pastimes – but it shouldn’t draw attention to itself in a story.

The story is written in white on an interesting blue paper effect background, which some people may dislike, but it didn’t distract me from the story, and fits with the style.

I will carry on reading (the author promises regular once weekly updates) because it has got my attention, and I want to find out more.

3 of 3 members found this review helpful.
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