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The Killer Healer and his Grim Reaper

By Shaeor, author of Chosen Shackles

May 12, 2016: What it has:

Reaper, as an urban modern-supernatural story, is pretty good. The magic is intriguing, and the information all hints to a bigger world. The worldbuilding itself seems skillful, but not particularly like the child of long contemplation. That’s not to say, though, that everything isn’t fleshed out. There is fairly strong logical consistency, here.

I enjoyed the character interactions and even got a grin or two out of them. With eleven chapters as of this review, at 2k words average, I’m pretty confident the story is going somewhere. We’ve gotten a good dose of backstory for one of the two main characters, and they are both interesting. I do believe that the author will take the solid structural start they have and make something of it. The clans, characters, and exposition are all fittingly unique and enticing. Some influences may come from ‘Pact’, in the magic department, which is creatively handled.

What it needs:

Reaper needs a more focused hand. Sentences are missing punctuation, gaining undeleted words, and lacking coherency. Rereads are necessary almost once a chapter or more when things are confusing. You get the sense that the author has not sufficiently scrutinized their work. Though they seem to be having fun, their writing is unprofessional. Needs editing. Corvid is an excellent character, but with the flyby style of narrative and rapid pace, it’s hard to connect. I really think the author would benefit from slowing down, and adding more immersive details. At least some editing.


For fans of the genre and those who aren’t bothered by the issues mentioned, give it a go. You’ll probably enjoy yourself.

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Thieftakers & Faeries in a dark renaissance world…

By Pietroschek, member

May 8, 2016: A worthy reading with atmosphere & interesting characters. Somewhere between a Warhammer Fantasy Witchhunter & Solomon Kane I would hint to roleplayers.

The first French author, whom I have read in a decade, came as a positive surprise and in full book length! Thanks to James Monaghan for sharing this freely.

The prose is easy to understand, detailed enough to imagine the scenes, and the chapters are kept short, so the flow never stagnates nor does boredom overwhelm us readers.

The protagonist works for the Thieftakers guild at start, and has his own familial secret to hide from all the world. Villainy and Betrayal lurk in the world his profession has to investigate, and the political demands of arranging with the wishes of superiors are just one more mature streak to the fiction we get!

A really interesting fantasy fiction, and sure some less cute faeries along with it! 😉

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When Angels and Grades Fall

By Patrick Rochefort, member

Jun 26, 2015: 1.5 out of 5 stars.

The good: The premise of a young girl selected by a celestial being to be his personal angel was engaging and interesting.

The bad: I slogged it out for the prologue and five entries, before I gave up.

The ugly: Ultimately, I can forgive the spelling errors. I can overlook the occasional broken formatting (because we’ve ALL had those battles with WordPress breaking our work).

But this story is all tell and no show.

Exposition happens, but dialogue is skipped. Narrative proclamations of awareness are evoked, but never explained. I’m left being given summary explanations of conversations that could be used to establish characterization.

Words are spent on description of items and places without any apparent relevance to the plot.

Most damning of all: As a reader, I find myself wishing for dialogue. There’s entire entries where dialogue is practically nonexistent; just paragraph after paragraph of unrelenting exposition and description.

When I finally got nothing but in entry 4, it’s a chatroom, without any indication of who the characters are or why I should care, and their conversation isn’t especially interesting, nor does it do much to drive the plot.

Entry 5 finally holds some promise, but the story is still stumbling on basic issues of technical english, such as proper punctuation, formatting, and narrative crafting.

All in all, I cannot recommend this serial, but it is clear to me that the author is working hard to revise and improve. I’ll keep an eye out for Taulsn’s future works.

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