This is the best I’ve seen on this site so far.
Two reasons. For one thing, you can actually write. I get so tired of reading things that have a great title, cool premise, and nifty setting . . . but read like junior high school. You’ve got a pro control going for you here and it’s great to see.
The other thing: the structure/format is WAY cool. I liked the tweets enclosed, but was really knocked out by the avatared comments.
It would be enough that you’re up on the top end of writing quality, but you’re also pointing the way to a lot of innovations that people who do web fiction should have been all over from the start.
Great job. You know, for a newbie.
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