I can see glimmers of promise in Dirigible Ditties. Every now and again as I’m reading it, I’ll see something that’s right, something good enough to make my head shift gears. I become interested in the story and start enjoying myself. Unfortunately that only lasts a few moments before another long sequence of exposition or stunted dialogue presents itself.

The opening for the Zed-26 storyline (And to All a Good Night) is very brave. Second-person perspective is a tough thing to pull off, and I’ve only ever seen it done well on a handful of occasions. I’m sad to say this isn’t one of them. It jumps around a lot, telling instead of showing, and somehow manages to leave out half the narrative, often forcing me to re-read sentences and puzzle out meanings in order to keep following the story. Plot-wise it’s interesting although confusing—even at the end of it I still didn’t fully understand what it was about.

The second story (Mind Moves Mass) was entirely different, more like an old sci-fi novel from the 1950s, and it made me do something I really hate to do: skimming over parts of the story. Absolutely nothing happens in this for 75% of the length of the story. I read page after page of rather clunky scenery descriptions, internal monologue without plot or emotional content, and awkward dialogue before I tuned out.

There are decent ideas in Dirigible Ditties. The world-building and some of the plot elements could really work, but it all needs a lot more polish before it can shine.

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