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Great parts, okay start

By CorpseMoney, member

Dec 27, 2016: Gamer Girl starts instantly, within a few paragraphs you’re right in the action. Two teenage girls with super powers, one of which is the title’s namesake a ‘game girl’.

Her power is an amazing idea, and alone has the makings to be very interesting. I will probably continue reading it just because of that.

The story may throw you off if you’re a fan of many other super hero serials. Unlike others the character has had the powers for some time, she aspires to be a hero, and isn’t forced to. The world isn’t suffering from a lack of heroes because apparently there is a decent population in the world.

The one part of the story that suffers in my opinion, is the characters. They both read almost like stereotypical cheerleaders. They’re overly happy, excited, amongst other various positive vibes. That is fine and even refreshing. But somehow out of place. The two girls dialogue often gave me feeling where I wanted to cringe inside out, before long I just began to wish for two entirely different main characters.

That’s the main problem of the story, the world is interesting, Gamer Girls superpower is amazing. But the main characters made me hate them long before the story could go anywhere.

Lastly a smaller nitpick is the author/main characters uses of her power, at the end of the chapters he provides a list of games which the character summoned things from.

It occurred to me for example in the first chapter she was using halo energy shields, if she would’ve summoned a covenant energy sword she probably would’ve defeated the enemy easily.

That’s probably more a problem of the authors need to balance the level of the main characters power, with the need to not make each encounter too simple. Which he attempted to do by bottlenecking the main character with a level system.

Even with the level system it seemed there were many more work around which would make the main character easily the most powerful character in existence. Which will probably cause an escalating plot problem in the future, but that neither here nor there.

As I said there are great parts to this story; great world, great super power, great character themes.

But the characters clash with the themes laid atop them, I feel it would read better if it was wrote more like Worm. The part where Kaze tells Ralph to "never kill" made me want to get up and leave. Especially with a superpower as out of this world as Gamer Girl’s, video game characters kill or delete game NPCs all the time. The themes just clash really hard in my mind, but I’m interested to see where it goes.

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