overall 3 votes: rating onrating onrating halfrating offrating off
editor rating: rating onrating onrating halfrating offrating off

Legends by Mel Keegan

The Fall of the Atlantean Empire 

In an era of storm and chaos, One will be born who will command the Power, but the ancient magic that flows in his veins like blood is his curse as well as his gift.

In this time of cataclysm and ordeal, the upstart Empire of Vayal has placed a bounty on the heads of all scions of the lineage of Diomedas, for the oracle foretold the doom of Vayal, and it rides on the shoulders of the One.

He lives and breathes already, hiding the old city of Zeheft and in the slowly drowning outlands. He is Faunos, still dangerously young—and he has one dread: the witchfinders of Vayal, who are charged with the hunting of those like himself.

Twenty years, Faunos has hidden and learned, until the gods of sea, storm and earth take Zeheft; and one night destiny brings Vayal’s young witchfinder to the camps of the water gypsies, where Faunos should not have been. The Empire of the Atlantan has one slender chance to survive, and its struggle will begin on this night.

Note: Legends contains some graphic sexual content and graphic violence.


A serialized novel, updating daily

Tags: · · · · ·

Listed: Feb 21, 2009

Share:

  • Facebook
  • Delicious
  • Reddit
  • StumbleUpon
  • Twitter

more . . .

Recommendations

No reader recommendations yet.

Member Shelves

No relevant member shelves.

Have Your Say!

Register or log in to rate, recommend, review, or bookmark this story.

Note: You can monitor reviews for this listing with its review feed.

Vote for it on topwebfiction.com . . .


Editorial Reviews

the_author() rating onrating onrating halfrating offrating off

Florid infodump

By Chris Poirier, editor

Mar 6, 2009: Legends is a verbose, ’80s-style, Romeo-and-Juliet-esque, gay-themed fantasy, set in what may be the final days of Atlantis. There are a lot of high fantasy themes—sorcery, chosen ones, priest kings—as well as a mix of Greek, Egyptian, and (I suspect) Aztec mythology. Unfortunately, after 9 long chapters, very little has actually happened, and the backstory—while detailed—offers little compensation.

The story follows two main characters: Soran, the crown prince of the current empire; and Faunos, the "witchboy" heir to the magic-legacy of the previous one. Faunos is a pretty-boy (I honestly can’t tell you much more about him—he’s routinely described as young and slender and pretty-to-look-at, but nothing deeper comes across), and is plagued by a power he doesn’t really want, and on the run from those who would kill him. Soran is a powerful warrior in the classical Greek style, and one of those enemies, sworn to hunt down all "witchboys" before they can trigger a terrrible prophecy. You can probably guess the general shape of that prophecy. In Chapter 9—what’s available at the time of this writing—the two have just met, in a gypsy camp, where they have coincidentally both gone looking for an anonymous night of passion. I presume they won’t realize who the other is until after the fact, but that remains to be seen.

There are a lot of ways a story like this could go. It could be a campy romp through the fantasy cliches, or an angsty Shakespearean tragic romance—or even just a fun, erotic diversion. Unfortunately, Legends is none of these things. It takes itself very seriously, and spends most of its time on its invented history. It is a dry read, full of hard-to-say names and florid infodump about the sky and the waves and the sensual nature of palace life. It’s not a Harlequin, by any means, but the mentioned eye candy does seem intended to evoke a club scene from Queer as Folk, or maybe a Conan movie. It’s slow in its pacing, and the writing is very loose and verbose. In fact, by Chapter 7, I started skimming, and didn’t really feel I’d missed anything.

At this point, I still have very little feel for the characters. The writing is not experiential in nature—in fact, I can think of only three or four real scenes where characters talked to each other and did things and filled-in as people—in an hour and a half of reading. The backstory is very detailed—and it’s clear the author has spent a good deal of time researching ancient mythologies, and fantasy in general—but it is all explained to us in fine detail by a narrator who seems uninterested in his own characters. The narrative is dry and uncompelling as a result. In fact, at this point, nothing has actually happened, yet. The only tension is in Soran’s reaction to his father’s torturer, who he clearly doesn’t like and wants to see dead. And that’s a very minor side point, so far. Entire chapters where Soran’s life is theoretically in danger from a storm are told without tension, primarily because so much time is spent on backstory, description of the stormy waves and sky, and flowery, rehearsed-sounding speeches.

In terms of the sex and gay romance elements, there is actually very little of either present in the chapters presently available to read. The story is pre-occupied with physical attraction, in a way, but beyond the eye candy in the palace—and the implication of an orgy-seeking mindset of the aristocracy—nothing has really happened on either front. There hasn’t been any romance at all, yet. There is an implication that both things are about to change, in the middle of Chapter 9, but, to be honest, it’s too little, too late.

I don’t know that Legends has an audience. Overwrought, ’80s fantasy feels very dated, at this point, and the backstory gets in the way of any gay romance elements, rather than enhancing them. Add in the very lax narrative and . . . well, it isn’t quite a tough slog, but it’s close. I won’t be reading further.

Note: This review was written after part 9a. There has been about a week and a half of updates, since, which I have not read.

1 of 1 members found this review helpful.
Help us improve!  Register or log in to rate this review.

continue with member reviews »

Most Helpful Member Reviews

the_author() rating onrating onrating halfrating offrating off

Interesting Premise But Dense Prose

By Frances Gonzalez, member

Feb 24, 2009: Good site design, easy to navigate.

What’s evident right off the bat is that the backstory and world is intensely—and admirably—developed. The main problem? Deciding whether or not you want to read all the purple prose in order to learn more about that world. Mostly the prose works beautifully, as in the first chapters of roaring seas and storms. But even then it gets clunky with examples such as: "The sea was like molten lead, heaving in a great cauldron." So . . . everyone [more . . .]

the_author() rating onrating onrating onrating offrating off

No title

By sara greenwald, member

Feb 22, 2009: This book seems to be for readers who like stylized language, palace intrigue, hints of violence and torture (which the protagonist opposes), and a mildly erotic atmosphere.

[more . . .]

Your review

Register or log in to rate, recommend, review, or bookmark this story.